


Awkward Moment

by JustATsunderePotato



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: But this is NOT smut, Comedy, Crack, F/F, I rated this M because porn is involved, Just crack-y humor, One Shot, Seulrene, kpop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-17 09:50:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16972338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustATsunderePotato/pseuds/JustATsunderePotato
Summary: Don’t you just hate it when you accidentally play porn in front of your crush?





	Awkward Moment

**Author's Note:**

> There’s some nsfw content described in here along with some crude language. Just a head’s up.

Most people dreaded doing laundry.

But no. Not Irene. She absolutely _loved_ it. It was one of the things in life that never ceased to make her happy (other than looking at a certain girl’s face and ironing clothes.)

The constant hum of the washing machine as it went through its numerous spin cycles, the warmth of the freshly dried clothes that enveloped her as she removed them from the dryer, the scent of her favorite fabric softener which reminded her of her childhood and always made her feel at ease...

She loved it all.

It wasn’t exactly considered to be one of the usual “fun” types of hobbies that other people had like hiking, collecting stamps, drawing, and stuff like that, but Irene didn’t really fit in what society deemed as “normal” in the first place so she didn’t mind.

On this one particular cold, winter day, she decided to catch up on the laundry. It wouldn’t do to have too much build up and leave the girls without any clean clothes to wear, especially when it was freezing outside. 

“Laundry, laundry, time to put away the laundry,” hummed Red Velvet’s leader as she happily walked from the laundry room, clad in a cute bunnie onesie while holding a full sized basket of fresh, clean laundry. It even had a cute hoodie with two floppy bunny ears that bobbed up and down as she walked.

She got it from her parents on her last birthday. What made it even more special was that it was a light shade of purple, her favorite color in the whole wide world. 

If any of the fans saw her dressed like that, they would have fainted from the cuteness overload. Anyone who thought otherwise could kiss her fluffy white tail. (Not literally though. The thought of some stranger kissing her butt made her feel weird even though she would have thousands of willing volunteers.)

Some may have thought such attire was childish, but Irene didn’t care. It was a special gift from her beloved parents and she loved to show how much she appreciated gifts by making good use of them. Plus it was cold outside and her other pajamas were in the washing machine getting cleaned.

She had to wear _something_. There was no way she was going to walk around in some flimsy little tank top and shorts in the middle of freaking winter. Irene would die from the cold dressed like that even with the heater on blast.

Being the resident dorm mother, the laundry was naturally her domain. Nobody else dared touch the washing machine and dryer, especially after how numerous mishaps had happened in the past.

There was one incident where a lone pink sock somehow ended up mixed in with a pile of white clothes and turned everything that was in that load to light pink. The only person in the group that didn’t seem to be that bothered by it was Yeri who just shrugged and said “I’m fine with it. I’m a SONE after all.”

The culprit was never found, but Irene had a sneaking suspicion it was Yeri. She was the only one in the dorm that had Jigglypuff socks.

And how could she forget the time where Joy mistook the bottle of bleach for soap and ruined a whole load of perfectly good clothes that had to be put into the clothes-to-wear-when-the-group-does-spring-cleaning-and-didn’t-want-to-ruin-their-good-clothes pile.

That day Irene constantly asked herself where she went wrong in raising the former maknae. 

Then there was the time when Seulgi put too much soap in the washer and flooded the entire dorm. The only reason Irene found out was when she got home, took a step inside, heard the carpet go “sloosh” and was greeted with the sight of foamy bubbles and water all over the floor. It was like somebody randomly decided to set up a water park inside their house. Irene liked water parks, but she didn’t particularly want her home to become one while she was away running errands.

_“I-I’m s-so sorry, unnie,” Seulgi managed to croak out in between sobs, tears and snot running down her face. “I didn’t mean to ruin everything—”_

_Irene didn’t have it in her to scold Seulgi as harshly as she would have if it was any of the other girls that made the same mistake. Was that biased? Yes. But she didn’t particularly care at that moment. All she wanted to do was stop the person she cared for the most in the world from crying even more. So Irene hugged the bear and rubbed circles on her back as she said reassuring words to the younger girl._

_“It’s okay, Seulgi,” Irene whispered tenderly as she kissed the sobbing bear on the forehead. “Everybody makes mistakes sometimes.” The elder carefully wiped away a tear with her finger as she gave Seulgi a reassuring smile._

_The difference in treatment didn’t go unnoticed._

_“You didn’t say that when I made a teensy weensy mistake. Once.”_

_Irene turned around and saw the pouting face of the group’s former maknae, Joy, who had her arms crossed._ Irene frowned. _“Your mistake destroyed over $800 worth of clothes,” the leader stated matter-of-factly._

_Joy rolled her eyes. “That’s nothing compared to all the water damage Hurricane Seulgi caused.”_

_Seulgi’s lip quivered and Irene felt a pang in her heart at the sight. While what Joy said_ _was the truth, Irene wasn’t going to let Seulgi feel any more guilty than necessary. It was obvious that Seulgi was very apologetic for her mistake._

_“It wasn’t Seulgi. It was our defective washing machine.”_

_“What? But she just admitted to—“_

_“It. Was. The. Washing. Machine.”_

The conversation ended there. Once Irene used the “mom voice” that was it. End of discussion.

It was only because they lived there so long and had the same washing machine all those years (which apparently was recalled by the manufacturer three separate times for having so many issues) that SM entertainment foot the bill for the damage caused by the flood.

But even if the company decided to act like a jerk and tried to put the blame on Red Velvet, Irene would have had no problem paying for the damages. She had built up a sizeable savings account from all the work she had done over the years. 

Needless to say after all that, everyone was banned from doing, or attempting to do, the laundry on their own. Anyone caught violating the hands off rule would be severely punished. Irene didn’t specifically state what the punishment would be, but that was done on purpose. The punishment would be tailored to each offender.

A shiver ran down Irene’s spine as she remembered those incidents. There was no way she could handle yet another laundry fail. Who knows what else would happen if the girls were allowed to touch the machines again. Cause the dryer to catch on fire for not cleaning out the lint trap? Accidentally make the washing machine tip over by overloading it and possibly cause another flood? 

Just thinking about more potential accidents gave the leader anxiety. Her whole head would turn gray before she turned thirty if the girls were allowed to touch the machines again unless they went through rigorous training (although Irene highly doubted any of them would bother trying to learn how to wash their clothes without causing trouble.) She had had enough excitement for a lifetime.

“Okay just gotta set this down and....” Irene said as she walked in front of the couch in the living room and set the laundry basket on the ground. “There.” She sat down and moved some stray pillows out of the way so she could have enough room to put the folded clothes in their respective piles.

After ensuring that there was enough space, the laundry master reached into the basket, pulled out some shirts with images of cute bears and other animals on them and smiled. They belonged to Seulgi.

Irene loved each and every member with all of her heart but when it came to Seulgi....it was different.

She had feelings for the bear. Whether or not it was obvious was something Irene wasn’t sure of, but she knew for sure that the feelings she had for the younger girl went way deeper than just pure sisterly love The last time she felt this way was when she met a girl from high school that made her fall in love with the color purple. Things didn’t work out between them (obviously) and when it all came crashing down, Irene made a promise to herself that she was never going to put herself through the torturous hell known as love again. Her heart was going to be put under tight lock and key; never to be opened up again no matter what.

That is until Seulgi came rolling into her life during their trainee days and made her rethink her vow of never opening up her heart again.

But just because Irene was interested in Seulgi didn’t automatically mean that she could just go up to the other girl and ask her out. She wasn’t even sure if Seulgi was gay or not. The bear was very private and never really talked about love and the like. And when she did, it was only during interviews and she always used gender neutral pronouns.

Seulgi’s sexual orientation was a mystery that the leader had yet to solve.

Irene sighed as she looked around for the TV remote for a few moments before discovering it was stuck in between the couch cushions.

She always watched TV when she folded laundry. Well almost always. There were times when the two maknaes played their video games and the like on that specific TV (which sometimes lasted for hours). Thankfully they weren’t around. 

She vaguely remembered hearing one of them say they were going to the mall to do some shopping or something to that effect. That was fine by Irene. At least she had the chance to get more chores done without the Satanic duo running around causing mischief.

It wasn’t like Irene despised the two girls. She loved them with all her heart and saw them as the little sisters she never had. It was just nice to be able to enjoy some peace in the dorm for once without them yelling like wild animals. 

But she couldn’t work in complete silence. Well technically she could if she really put her mind to it, but it didn’t make sense to put away the laundry in complete silence if she didn’t absolutely have to. She needed something to listen to, even if it was just background noise. 

The laundry master pulled out the remote and took a moment to look at it It was pretty big, a bit longer than her whole hand. But if Irene could hold a million items in her hands and not drop them, she could hold anything, including ridiculously large remotes without any problems. Honestly she could probably knock someone out with it and use it as a sort of baton if need be. The hunk of plastic was pretty heavy. It looked intimidating with all of the different types of buttons on it. She didn’t like why the remotes these days looked so cluttered. The ones from her day were simpler and and much easier to navigate.

Thankfully Wendy taught the most technologically challenged person in the group how to use the remote. It took Irene a few tries to remember which buttons to press, but after a few moments, she was able to successfully find her way to the On Demand section without causing the cable box to spontaneously combust.

So far, so good.

Irene scrolled through the lists of available titles looking for something interesting to watch. Nothing really popped out at her until she came across a title of show that sounded vaguely familiar. She tapped on the “more info” button and while reading the synopsis, immediately realized that it was a cartoon she watched in her younger days.

“Wow....how long has it been since I last watched this?” Irene asked herself as she counted backwards from the current year using her fingers. A shocked gasp escaped from her lips when she realized the answer.

Nine years.

The last time she watched the cartoon with the blue robot cat from the future was nine years ago. 

She was still in high school.

_Has it really been that long?_

Time really did fly by in a blink of an eye.

During her high school days, she usually didn’t have a lot of free time to herself. The school she went to was notorious for the enormous amount of homework it gave its students. The administration claimed it was done to prepare its students for the future, but Irene had a feeling they just wanted everyone to suffer. But on the rare occasions when Irene was free, she allowed herself to unwind from the many stresses of life by watching cartoons.

Doraemon was one of her personal favorites.

Oh how she wished she had a bag that could hold an infinite amount of stuff like Doraemon did with his pouch. Then the poor girl wouldn’t have to lug giant suitcases around whenever the group had to travel. It just seemed so convenient. Granted, it probably could’ve swallowed her whole if she somehow fell into it and then she probably would’ve been stuck in there forever, but other than that, the idea of having a bag with an unlimited amount of storage sounded amazing.

But sadly such things only existed in fantasy.

Irene chose an episode at random and sat back on the couch as she picked up a shirt at random from the laundry pile. She leaned back and made herself comfortable.

She expected to hear the familiar joyful theme song play, but heard a deep, low guttural moan instead.

That was definitely _not_ part of the opening theme song that she heard time and time again growing up.

Confused, Irene looked up from the shirt she was folding and what she saw made her jaw drop. Literally.

There on the sixty-five inch flat screen TV in all its HD glory was a naked, sweaty, muscular man laid out on a couch stroking himself like there was no tomorrow. All while moaning obnoxiously. 

“What the hell!” 

It wasn’t like Irene had never saw porn before. She was twenty-seven years old after all. But she didn’t expect to be slapped in the face with something that she only had experience seeing on much smaller screens in. Especially in HD.

There was something jarring about seeing what you normally saw in bad quality pop up on such a huge screen in high quality. Is this what paid subscribers saw all the time? If so, they were certainly getting their money’s worth.

“How did this even happen?” Irene asked out loud despite being alone, clearly panicking. She looked behind her, checking to see if anyone else was around. When she saw that the coast was (thankfully) clear, she hastily grabbed the remote and tried to push the exit button, but her finger slipped and raised the volume instead, causing the moaning to become even louder than before.

That was definitely _not_ what she intended to do.

“Ahhh! Ahhhhh!” the man groaned.

Irene cringed. She wasn’t one that appreciated the male physique. 

_Crap I gotta turn this off before someone comes-_

“Hey unnie have you seen my—oH MY GOD!”

Irene whipped her head around and locked eyes with a wide eyed Seulgi, who dropped the pink frosted donut with rainbow sprinkles she was in the middle of eating onto the floor. Her mouth hung so wide open in shock, a fly could have flew in there and took a bath.

That was saying something because Seulgi _never_ wasted food. Under normal circumstances, she would have instantly picked up the donut without any hesitation and claimed it was safe due to the almighty five second rule. But the situation was far from normal. The whole thing sounded like something that would happen on one of those dramas Joy and Yeri loved to watch.

The poor bear looked absolutely mortified. The last time Irene saw her make an expression like that was when the group watched some cheesy, wannabe edgy, romance movie based off of some fan fiction involving some girl and her super rich and (supposedly) handsome boss. The only reason why Irene bothered to watch it was because she was curious about how bad it was. The only entertaining thing about that night wasn’t the film itself, but the various facial expressions Seulgi made throughout the movie (especially during the sex scenes.)

If Irene wasn’t dying from embarrassment, she would’ve found the bear’s current facial expression to be hilarious. But the elder girl was way too preoccupied wishing a giant hole would appear out of nowhere, swallow her up whole, send her anywhere else in the world other than where she currently was.

The two girls both stared at each other in awkward silence, the younger constantly shifting her eyes back and forth between Irene and the TV. The only thing that made any noise in the room was the moaning actor on TV who just wouldn’t shut up.

“I-It’s not what you think!” Irene yelled as she got up off the couch, dropping the shirt she was folding onto the floor in the process. 

Seulgi just stared at her in disbelief.

_Oh great. You just made yourself look guilty by saying the number one sentence guilty people say when they get caught doing something they weren’t supposed to do. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid_. 

Irene had to say something. Quick.

But what does one say after somehow putting on porn and having your crush walk in right after you accidentally increased the volume of said porn?  If only there was some sort of guide that talked about what one should do in awkward moments like these then Irene would’ve been better prepared and not make herself look like a bumbling fool.

She needed to fix it. 

Unfortunately Irene’s brain short circuited and she blurted out the first thing that came to her mind.

“Your abs are nicer than his!” As soon as the words passed through her lips, Irene felt like slapping herself. This was definitely _not_ the time to be complimenting Seulgi’s abs, no matter how true it was. In fact, it probably made Irene look even weirder through Seulgi’s eyes.

The bear looked down at her stomach and patted it before looking back up to the TV for a second and blushing hard. “Thanks...?” she responded quietly, clearly surprised by the random compliment.

"You’re welcome.”

The room became silent once more. Seulgi broke off eye contact and focused her attention on something on the ceiling that was apparently easier to look at than Irene’s scarlet face. She brought her hand to her mouth and coughed into it awkwardly; a thing people usually did when they didn’t know what to say next.

The younger girl opened and closed her mouth a few times, as if she was going to say something, but the words wouldn’t come out. She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath before opening them and looking Irene straight in the eye.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt your...” Seulgi paused as her eyes flicked up to look at the TV then back to Irene before finally settling on the ground. “Viewing experience.”

_Oh god. Please have mercy and strike me down now._

Irene frantically shook her head and waved her hands defensively. “What?! Oh no no no no no! I didn’t put this on!”

The younger girl sighed. “It’s....” Seulgi trailed off as she fiddled with her fingers as she shuffled her feet together, clearly struggling to find the right words. “It’s okay unnie. I won’t judge.”

“How is any of this possibly okay!” Irene felt like screaming, but didn’t because that wouldn’t have helped the situation at all. She had already made the situation one thousand times worse with her big fat mouth. 

Irene knew Seulgi was just being nice. She had to be. The girl was a literal angel.

“We all have our....preferences.” 

_Preferences_.

The word echoed through Irene’s mind and made her want to die.

Seulgi thought she was straight when the leader was _far_ from that.

“I don’t like dick!” the older girl shouted louder than she originally intended as she pointed an accusatory finger at the screen behind her. The neighbors probably heard her yell out her confession from the top of her lungs.

Irene honestly didn’t expect to come out of the closet in such an aggressive way, especially to the girl she liked, but there was no way she was going to let Seulgi think she was straight.

Seulgi blinked once. Twice. Her once surprised facial expression transforming to one that was unreadable. “Oh.”

Soft giggles could be heard from the kitchen until they erupted into full blown laughter.  

"BWUAHAHAHAHA!”

“Oh my god! You should’ve seen your face!,” Joy cackled as she popped up from behind the kitchen counter while clapping her hands like an amused seal. “It was so funny!”

Anger bubbled up from within Irene as she stared at Joy. She wanted nothing more than to smack that grin off her smug face.

How dare she be humiliated like this. In front of Seulgi no less.

“And I have it all on film,” Yeri chuckled mischievously as she jumped out from behind Joy, waving her phone around with a playful grin. “No pun intended.”

The older Satan wiped away a tear of laughter as she patted the maknae on the back. “Good job, partner. I’m so proud of you.”

“Couldn’t have done it without you, un—”

Before Yeri could finish her sentence, the laundry basket flew by her face faster than a speeding bullet and hit the wall, breaking in half upon impact with plastic shrapnel flying everywhere before finally falling to the ground with a loud thud. 

There was a significant dent in the wall, along with some pieces of stucco that crumbled and fell onto the floor.

Irene threw it. Hard.

The two troublemakers looked at the person responsible for throwing the laundry basket with enough force that rivaled that of the Hulk himself.

Irene was absolutely furious. She looked like one of those old time cartoon characters that had the big angry vein on their forehead. Her face was flushed with anger and, if one looked close enough, they could see smoke coming out of her ears. There was a fire in her eyes that would make anyone who received that look wet their pants, whether it was from arousal or fear.

She. Was. Pissed.

“You....!” She growled. 

“Oh sh-“

“Quick gawking and start running, you idiot!” shouted Yeri as she grabbed Joy’s hand and ran. “Let’s run to fight another day!”

Irene stormed out of the room and ran after them, forgetting to turn off the TV.

She was going to make them pay.

 

* * *

 

After punishing the two troublemakers accordingly and ensuring that the embarrassing video was deleted and that there were no extra copies floating around, Irene finished doing the laundry. In silence. She didn’t want to potentially risk having a repeat of the embarrassing incident earlier. She even unplugged the internet modem and TV....just in case. 

She stood outside of Seulgi’s door with Seulgi’s folded clothes in one hand and raised her other fist to knock, but hesitated. How could she face her crush after such an awkward incident? The other girl probably thought she was some kind of deranged pervert.

Well it’s not like Irene would blame Seulgi if she did. She did shout out that she didn’t like dick. That could’ve been phrased better, but nooooo. She just had to shout it out for the whole world to hear.

_She probably doesn’t want to see me anyways._

Irene sighed as she put her hand down and set the clothes on the ground in front of the door, and started walking away before she heard the door open.

“Unnie?”

Irene looked back and there Seulgi was, standing under the door frame and looking at her with curious eyes.

The air was thick with awkwardness and Irene absolutely hated it. She had dealt with enough awkwardness for a lifetime.

But she was the older one. That meant that she needed to act more maturely. 

Sometimes you gotta fake it til you make it. So Irene put on her best polite smile and pretended that all the chaos from earlier never happened. 

“I just wanted to leave your clothes here. Sorry to disturb you.”

Irene turned to walk the opposite way, her facade threatening to crumble with each step she took. She needed to get away quickly so she could scream into her pillow and just stare at the ceiling, contemplating her life choices.

That was the plan until long delicate fingers wrapped around her wrist in a firm yet gentle grip.

“Wait.”

Irene looked back at the bear in confusion. Didn’t Seulgi get the hint? Weren’t they supposed to pretend that nothing happened? Unless....she wanted to talk about it?

Seulgi let go of Irene’s wrist, mumbling apologies for acting so suddenly as she rubbed the back of her neck. “I didn’t get to say this earlier because we got interrupted but...”

The younger girl looked around the hallway, checking to see if anyone was around and when she saw that they were alone, motioned for Irene to get closer to her. Irene obliged. But she would have been lying if she said she didn’t feel like screaming from the top of her lungs when she felt Seulgi’s hot breath on her ear. The act itself was so....intimate and personal.

“I....don’t like dick either.”

It took Irene a few moments to process what Seulgi said to her before she stepped back and looked at Seulgi up and down. Did Seulgi just say that? Or was this all a dream?

Irene slapped herself on the forehead to see if she was dreaming.

Yep. It was real. The pain from the slap was proof enough.

“Did you just....slap yourself?”

“I uh....” Irene hesitated for a moment, trying to come up with something somewhat believable. She didn’t usually like to lie but she felt she embarrassed herself enough for one day. There was no reason to do so any more by saying the truth. “I thought I felt a spider crawl there and wanted to kill it before it bit me?”

The shorter girl’s breath hitched as Seulgi got closer to her face and looked closely at her head, searching for the imaginary spider that was mentioned. “I don’t see anything....”

“Oh. Well good. That’s good.”

“Yep.”

“So wait....does that mean..?”

There was no need to ask the question fully. It was obvious what Irene was referring to.

Seulgi nodded slowly, cheeks reddening in embarrassment.

“A-Anyways thanks for folding my laundry. I really appreciate it.”

“No problem.”

Irene felt like she was on top of the world. The question she had been dying to find the answer to was finally revealed! Seulgi liked girls too! What did she do in her past life to have been blessed with such good luck! 

She mentally patted herself on the back.

“Um...I haven’t exactly told anyone else about this so I would appreciate it if you didn’t....”

“I wont tell anyone. Pinky promise,” Irene swore as she stuck out her pinky and linked it with Seulgi’s.

The pact was made.

She felt so overjoyed that she felt like screaming, but restrained herself. There was enough excitement that happened on the day. So she settled for just smiling instead, but not too much. She didn’t want to potentially scare Seulgi off (for real this time.)

When the two parted ways (Seulgi said she needed to take a shower), Irene skipped happily to her room. Doing that while wearing a onesie that covered her feet entirely was probably a bad idea since she almost fell down twice in the process but whatever. She survived.

What mattered the most was that Irene had a chance. 

Maybe there was hope for her after all.

**Author's Note:**

> I love crack humor. A lot.
> 
> I wear I’m a mature potato but sometimes you just get the urge to write something crack-y and you just can’t resist....!
> 
> I hope this made you laugh or at least crack a little smile haha
> 
> Thank you for taking the time to read! :)


End file.
